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Honoring the Departed: Understanding Japanese Funeral Customs and Traditions

03/15/2025

In Japan, funerals are profound ceremonies that blend deep-rooted traditions with contemporary practices, reflecting the nation’s cultural emphasis on respect, family, and spirituality. Understanding these customs offers insight into the Japanese way of honoring the deceased and supporting the bereaved.

Preparation and Immediate Rituals

Upon a person’s passing, specific rituals are observed to prepare the body and console the family. The body is carefully washed and dressed, often in a white kimono for women or a suit for men. Personal items, such as sandals and six coins (symbolizing passage to the afterlife), are placed with the deceased. The body is then laid with the head facing north or west, aligning with Buddhist beliefs about the afterlife. A small table adorned with flowers, incense, and a candle is positioned beside the deceased, creating a space for family and friends to offer their respects. During this period, it’s customary to cover any household Shinto shrines with white paper, a practice known as “kamidana-fūji,” to shield them from the impurity associated with death.

The Wake (Otsuya)

The wake, or “otsuya,” is typically held the evening before the funeral service. Guests attend to pay their respects, dressed in formal black attire—men in black suits with white shirts and black ties, and women in black dresses or kimonos. Attendees often bring “kōden,” a monetary offering to assist with funeral expenses, presented in special black-and-silver envelopes. The ceremony includes a Buddhist priest chanting sutras, with family members and guests offering incense at designated stations. This ritual not only honors the deceased but also provides solace to the grieving family.

The Funeral Service (Osōshiki)

The formal funeral service, known as “osōshiki,” involves several key elements:

1. Sutra Chanting: A Buddhist priest recites sutras to guide the deceased’s spirit.

2. Incense Offering (Oshōkō): Attendees approach the altar, offer incense, and say a silent prayer.

3. Post-Ceremony Rituals: After the service, guests may place flowers in the casket before it is sealed. The casket is then transported to the crematorium, as cremation is the prevalent practice in Japan.

Cremation and Bone-Picking Ceremony

Cremation is the standard method of body disposition in Japan. Following cremation, a unique ritual called “kotsuage” takes place, where family members use special chopsticks to transfer the bones of the deceased into an urn. This act is performed with great care and reverence, symbolizing the family’s final act of service to their loved one.

Mourning Period and Memorial Services

The mourning period in Japan is marked by a series of memorial services:

Shijūkunichi (49th Day): This day holds particular significance, as it is believed the deceased’s spirit completes its journey to the afterlife. A memorial service is held, and the urn is often interred during this time.

Obon Festival: An annual event where families honor their ancestors, believing that spirits return to the earthly realm. Traditions include cleaning graves, offering food, and performing dances.

Throughout the mourning period, families may display a photograph of the deceased near a household altar, offering daily prayers and incense. Additionally, during the first year after death, it is customary to refrain from sending or receiving New Year’s Day cards, informing friends and relatives in advance to observe this tradition.

Cultural Sensitivities and Evolving Practices

Japanese funeral customs are deeply intertwined with cultural beliefs and societal norms:

Numerical Superstitions: The number four, pronounced “shi,” sounds like the word for “death” and is considered unlucky. Efforts are made to avoid this number in various contexts, including during funerals.

Chopstick Etiquette: Passing objects directly from one person’s chopsticks to another’s is avoided, as it resembles the bone-picking ceremony, which is exclusive to funerals.

In recent times, Japan has seen shifts in traditional funeral practices due to urbanization and changing societal structures. The decline in ancestral reverence and the financial burden of maintaining family graves have led to an increase in “haka-jimai,” the practice of closing down graves. Some temples, like Myoraku-ji, have responded by offering services to respectfully house neglected gravestones, reflecting the evolving landscape of Japanese funerary traditions.

Understanding and respecting these customs is essential for those participating in Japanese funerals, as they embody the nation’s profound respect for the deceased and the importance of familial and communal support during times of loss.


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